Friday, March 15, 2013

Venting, Complaining, Bullying

Venting, Complaining, Bullying

We all need to vent at times. Basically, this need of "complaining" to someone is a "momentary and instant gratification" and a temporary relief for one's pain. Having someone listen is a good sounding block and a strengthening technique for a person, but in reality it does not relieve one of the poisonous residue which has been created in one's stomach which sits and eats one's inside, not solving or resolving anything.
We always should do what our heart tells us to do. Nothing is better than pure honesty!
Sometimes being open and telling the truth is scary and intimidating. Fear of the unknown outcome is always seems much worse than it actually is. In reality, nothing terrible may happen if we tell the truth, and the world will definitely not come apart at the seams.
No need to worry or be afraid. God always watches us, protects us and has our back, thus, sending us on an even better path... So, at times even when it seems that we are down in the dumps and nothing worse can happen to us..., in reality it may be a blessing in disguise. Sometimes, we may learn major lessons along the way. This is done through and by the great power of the divine, and that's more than fine too and needs to be appreciated as well. We need to acknowledge, recognize and not take anything for granted which God gives us... He knows exactly what is right for us and what needs to be done. Therefore, He plants the seeds of truth deep inside our heart. We need to reach inside and let that truth, grow, blossom, and shine.
One simply has to arrive at total trust and fully and whole heartedly love one-self. We can only be the best that we can be and strive to make ourselves even be better.
Anything negative that's not good for us and is destroying us, we need to get rid of and disregard.
We always need to find the courage to boost and power ourselves. We don't have to work in a horrible environment, or be in a bad and unfulfilled relationship. Some people are like blood sucking parasites who love to bully, intimidate and make people misery. They need to do that and live off those people's misery which they create just for that reason in the first place. We never need to sit and take abuse and be miserable in a situation that we find ourselves in.
Self doubt is the worst possible thing! We have to really TRUST and we always have a choice to move on and up to something bigger, better, and higher.
Everything always happens for a reason. As one door closes, another one opens... Ultimately, it's all our choice of how we choose to live our life and how to make it more fulfilling.
The question is how much do we really want to get to that "higher" level of joy?

Your Truly, I.N. <3 :-)

Forcing a Relationship

There are times when we set expectations, demands and prerequisites on relationships, and at times push and force a relationship on another person, while one of the parties is really not interested in having a relationship with a particular person in the first place.
a) If there are any expectations, they should be clarified to the person one is expecting something from in a crystal clear manner.
b) We should not fight other people's battles on their behalf. Let the parties who are involved in a conflict find their own way to each other.
c) The two parties involved have their own lessons to learn and bridges to cross... We just have to sit back, take a deep breath, stay positive and hope for the best possible outcome.
d) Often, our involvement only causes more animosity and escalates into deeper anger, creating a harsher impact to that faulty relationship, spreading poison in us as well, which turns to negativity and ill residue as it sits and brews in our stomach creating sickness and unhealthy acid.
e) People allow others to bully and intimidate them. One thing to remember: People who intimidate and bully other people are actually very insecure and needy people on the inside. They need to push and intimidate other people in order to caress their "overly inflated" ego. Bullying other people makes these often "little" people feel "bigger" and (for no reason) feel that they are better than everyone else.
Inside, they may have a good and soft heart, but on the outside although they have a "tough" exterior, in reality they are quite insecure and need to feed their "security" of other people, thus creating their own kind of defense shield.
f) I believe that one needs to deal with these kind of people from the start and not to allow things to simmer because they love to pounce on people when a sign of a first opportunity arises.
g) Some people prefer the tactic of postponing telling the truth to avoid a conflict or a confrontation out of fear of "facing" them, and therefore, would rather currently avoid with an impending problem and deal with it later. They think that they are preventing a fight or refrain from antagonizing someone and thus, are "softening the blow". In reality, they are only causing more friction and are making the matters worse by allowing even more build up of anger and animosity.
Actually, the blow is much worse and more severe when it comes later because people have already had a chance to build up certain expectations and ideas of an outcome.
h) **Building up self confidence and courage to arrive at the truth is the key. Some people like to play the victim card and make themselves out to be unfortunate people who suffer due to certain circumstances, thus using other people who feel badly and sorry for them to fight battles on their behalf. This is a wrong and an unfair tactic, as in reality these "victims" are hiding behind the facade of lack of self confidence being afraid to discover who they really are, and finally building the ability of standing up and defending themselves. Often, this achieved inner self-control, confidence and love for one-self will diffuse a fight in itself and stop it in its tracks.
Yours Truly, I.N. <3 :-)